Sending Them Out
Prepare for Launch
get ready with these Helpful Resources
Matt. 12:46-50; Titus 1:5-9; 3 John 2-4
“The Greatest Gift”
A macaroni necklace. A glitter-bomb birthday card. A "World's Best Dad" coffee cup. If you've ever opened a present from your child, you know it's not the money they spent that makes it valuable. Instead, it's how the gift expresses their love. That's why parents can honestly say, "It's the thought that counts." But what's the greatest gift a parent could receive from their children? We've given stability and shepherding, but what do we hope we've prepared them to do? We send them out, hoping to rejoice with them when our Lord becomes their Lord.
What a gift — when a "son" or "daughter" becomes a "brother" or "sister" in Christ.
THE BIG IDEA
Imagine the day we serve our King alongside them as adults!
While hopefully, everyone loves their kids, maybe not everyone likes them. Some children grow up and become people you don't admire or enjoy being around. That's why we work every day to bring them under the shepherding and shaping influence of God. Faithful children don't happen by accident but by continually placing the Lord above all in a family's life (Titus 1:5-6).
Sometimes we're the bad guy, saying "no" until they learn to say it for themselves. Rather than treating our kindergarteners like buddies, we invest in disciplining them while they're small so that eventually, we can enjoy friendship with healthy, spiritually developed adults. Don't rush the process! And so we send them out into the world — not to leave us forever, but to build their own lives and families on what we've given them. We want to share our lives with their families because that's our family.
As parents, we look down the road beyond the piano recitals, report cards, and career decisions. It's fun to see our kids succeed, but life is full of hard choices. They need to know that if they lose their soul, they've lost everything (Mark 8:36). So keep the faith and remind them every day about the greatest gift ever given: salvation in Jesus!
Will your kids become people you enjoy being around?
THE BIG QUESTION
Joyful in Obedience
Rejoice When Your Children Follow the Lord
INTRODUCTION
Launch the study with a CONVERSATION STARTER on the Big Idea.
Read or watch “The Greatest Gift” (above). What do you take from that Big Idea and Big Question? ICE BREAKER — Get everyone engaged and talking.
What's the best Mother's Day or Father's Day present you've received?
ACT I
JESUS SAID — Matt. 12:46-50
What’s the main point of this passage?What insights and applications do you take from these words of Christ? What do we need to get from these words that — if understood and applied — has the power to change a life or a family?Is there anything else here you find helpful or interesting? Anything you’ve never noticed before — or have always loved about these words?
ACT II
HEAVY WORDS — Honor
We might not think much about honor, but the writers of both the Old and New Testaments spoke directly to a culture where honor and shame were fundamental concerns of daily life. When we honor someone, we see their worth and give weight to who they are. The Greek word for “honor” (τιμή — “timē”) means “price, value” and then secondly, “honor, reverence” [1]. The root of the Hebrew word for “honor” (כָבֵד — “kabod”) “literally means heavy or weighty. The figurative meaning, however, is far more common: ‘to give weight to someone.’” [2]. If you’re studying in a group, choose one passage you want to share something about, and prepare a few notes. Matt. 15:3-9; Rom. 12:10; 13:7; Eph. 6:2; 1 Peter 1:7; 2:7, 17; 3:7; John 4:44; 5:23; 12:26 How would you define the English word “honor”?What do you learn about honor from Scripture?How can kids honor their parents? Is there a time for parents to show honor to kids?What’s your biggest takeaway about relationships from these passages and this word?
1 - William Arndt et al., A Greek-English Lexicon of the New Testament and Other Early Christian Literature (BDAG)
2 - Sam Hamstra Jr., “Honor,” in Evangelical Dictionary of Biblical Theology
ACT III
REACH OUT — Connect with each other with this question.
How has your relationship changed with your children as they've grown?WRAP UP
THE CHALLENGE — Ready to put it into practice?
Give encouragement to a young person who has honored their parents by their faithfulness.REQUEST — Go to God in a closing prayer.
For example: "God, give our children a heart of wisdom" (cf. Prov. 10:1).“Don't Lose Momentum”
Conclusion
Here's the thing about riding a bike that may seem counterintuitive: the faster you go, the easier it gets to balance. You'd think the rider keeps the bike from falling over, but the bike's inertia makes a big difference too. Just send a bike speeding away without you, and you'd be surprised how far it goes. If you don't lose momentum, riding becomes a breeze. But momentum is also super important for parenting. Slow down, or stop following God's pattern, and things get a whole lot harder! So, as we wrap up our Training Wheels study, let's look back at the big ideas we've tackled, considering how they help us maintain our forward progress with our kids.
THE BIG IDEAS FROM THIS STUDY
Stable Foundations
Our leadership throughout our children's lives ingrains the truths, traits, and habits they'll need.
The marriage covenant is God's foundation for a stable family.
Worship isn't just what we do as a family, it's who we are.
Integrity reinforces our kids' structural support system.
When discipline demoralizes our kids, we do more harm than good.
Shepherding and Shaping
We can find our way in our parenting dilemmas by looking up.
Your life speaks volumes to those following behind you.
Good parenting is a daily choice you make, not the result of your child's choices.
The world is your child's classroom, whether you're teaching them or not.
The gospel of grace gives us a new lens to see ourselves, our kids, and our parenting.
You can talk at your child and make a lot of noise, or you can talk to them and get through.
Sending Them Out
As we send our children into the world, we can't protect them from every danger.
Our kids were created for his glory, not ours.
What a gift it is to call your child a "brother" or "sister" in Christ.
A CLOSING QUESTION
How has this study propelled you into better parenting?