Prepare for Launch
get ready with these Helpful Resources
John 10:3-4; James 1:19-27; Col. 4:5-6
“Eloquent Orations”
Their eyes glaze over. They stare off into the distance. Your words wash over them in waves of nonsensical noise. Like Charlie Brown's teacher, have you ever felt like your eloquent orations to your kids sound more like, "Wah wah woh wah wah" in their ears? Have we lost the ability to speak our child's language somewhere along the way? Is it even possible to communicate clearly with your kids? So as we shepherd and shape them, let's be more purposeful with what we say and how we say it.
You can talk at your child and make a lot of noise, or you can talk to them and get through.
THE BIG IDEA
Following Christ's example, our kids should know our voice (John 10:3-4). But it's more than recognizing the sound of someone's voice — it's about connecting with the meaning of the message. If our message isn't received, we're not communicating. Are we being understood? Or are we just spraying them with a sea of senseless sounds?
Communication isn't a one-way activity but a two-way dialogue. Listen to them — getting to know theirvoice — and consider how best to respond. It takes knowing yourself and your child to have a successful conversation. As we invest in becoming their sounding-board, we'd do well to be "quick to hear, slow to speak," controlling our tongues (James 1:19, 26). We communicate better when we commit to knowing our kids' world, where they're coming from, and what they're trying to tell us. Are you an effective listener or always doing the talking?
Season your words with grace (Col. 4:5-6), mindful of your headspace and attitude. Are you under control or losing your cool? A small child understands tone even when they don't grasp all the words. Whatever your child's age, how you say things can matter just as much as what you say. And remember that they will mirror what you talk about and how you say it.
Are you invested in hearing your kids and helping them to hear you?
THE BIG QUESTION
Communication
Be Purposeful With Your Communication
INTRODUCTION
Launch the study with a CONVERSATION STARTER on the Big Idea.
Read or watch “Eloquent Orations” (above). What do you take from that Big Idea and Big Question?
ICE BREAKER — Get everyone engaged and talking.
Did your parents ever answer "Because I said so"? What other non-answers do parents love to give?
ACT I
FINDING JESUS — John 10:3-4
What do you see Jesus about Jesus here?
What’s the point of the passage?
What insights and applications do you take from these words of Christ? What do we need to get from these words that — if understood and applied — has the power to change a life or a family?
Is there anything else here you find helpful or interesting? Anything you’ve never noticed before — or have always loved about these words?
ACT II
TOP 4 PROVERBS — Communication
Look through the list below (or any other resource you want to use) and choose four favorite Proverbs about communication, particularly keeping in mind how you interact with your kids. Then jot down a few notes on the application or insight you take from each verse. What do you appreciate about how it’s said and the wisdom it contains? How have you seen the principle in action? How does this principle affect how you communicate as a parent?
In group studies, take turns sharing a favorite proverb. Larger classes may want to break into groups for discussion.
Prov. 1:5, 8-9; 10:8, 11, 13, 19-21; 12:18-19, 25; 13:3; 15:1-2, 4, 23, 26; 16:20-24; 17:27-28; 18:2, 4, 13, 21; 20:12; 24:26; 25:11-12, 15; 26:4-5; 27:5; 29:20
Proverb #1
Proverb #2
Proverb #3
Proverb #4
ACT III
REACH OUT — Connect with each other with this question.
How has listening to your child helped you know how to lead them?
WRAP UP
THE CHALLENGE — Ready to put it into practice?
Go on a "date night" with your child and ask them about their interests.
REQUEST — Go to God in a closing prayer.
For example: "Almighty Father, teach me to listen to others the way you listen to me" (cf. Jer. 29:12).
NEXT SESSION — Guiding Through Trouble
Prepare by reading Luke 15:11-31; John 17:6-19; Ps. 23:4-6